What If I Don’t Trust My Spouse to Be Transparent with Finances? Is Collaborative Practice a Good Option for Me? Part 2
Structured Information Gathering and Disclosure Protocols
Collaborative Practice doesn’t just rely on people willingly sharing financial data to ensure financial transparency. (People tend to share more in Collaborative Practice than in traditional litigation.) Instead, the Collaborative team will insist on structured protocols for disclosure. These protocols typically include:
- Initial financial questionnaires: In Collaborative Practice, both clients must complete detailed forms disclosing assets, debts, income, and expenses. The neutral financial specialist then reviews the forms.
• Documentation requests: The neutral financial expert compiles a list of required documents (e.g., tax returns, pay stubs, credit card statements) that both spouses must provide.
• Team review: The collaborative team—attorneys, the financial specialist, and possibly mental health coaches—reviews all disclosures to ensure completeness.
Because this process is designed around full cooperation, if one spouse stalls or refuses to produce specific records, it signals a lack of good faith and could jeopardize the entire collaboration. That, in turn, creates pressure to comply, as the alternative (litigation) may be far more expensive, time-consuming, and adversarial.
If one spouse ultimately refuses to disclose certain financial details or intentionally hides assets, they risk the breakdown of the Collaborative process. Importantly, undisclosed assets can still come to light later. Such can result in serious legal and financial jeopardy, including court penalties or judgments in an ugly post-divorce legal battle. While Collaborative Practice seeks to stay out of court, it doesn’t remove legal obligations to be truthful about finances. All of the mandatory disclosure rules still apply. Collaborative Practice reinforces disclosure rules in a structured, solution-focused manner.
Building Trust Through Supportive Professionals
Distrust doesn’t only arise because of hidden credit card accounts or undisclosed investments. Sometimes, it’s rooted in years of conflict and hurt. Collaborative teams often include mental health professionals who serve as “divorce coaches,” helping each spouse communicate effectively.
To be clear, while the coaches are trained mental health professionals, they’re not acting as your therapist. Rather, they help you manage the emotional challenges of the negotiations. If worries about financial dishonesty are holding you back, your coach can help you clearly address your concerns in a constructive way.
Collaborative attorneys differ from traditional litigators because they strive to find solutions rather than more reasons to fight. While each attorney still advocates for their client, they do so within the Collaborative framework of open communication and respect. Your attorney can address any financial red flags and work with the financial expert to protect your interests. This advocacy, paired with a problem-solving mindset, can help reassure you that you’ll have a voice at the table—even if you’re starting from a place of mistrust.
Comparisons to Traditional Litigation and Mediation
Financial documents are exchanged through formal legal discovery processes in a typical litigated divorce. This can be stressful, costly, and time-consuming. In formal discovery processes at court, the attorney might request the production of documents, interrogatories, and subpoenas. While these methods can unearth hidden assets, they tend to escalate the adversarial tone, making mistrust grow even more potent. Litigation may involve repeated court appearances, depositions, and high legal fees.
Mediation is another out-of-court option, typically involving one neutral mediator who doesn’t represent either spouse. If you have significant concerns about financial secrecy, a mediator may not have the same enforcement tools or structured protocols that a collaborative team employs. Moreover, you might miss the reassurance of having your own attorney by your side during the negotiation process. If your spouse is especially skilled at deflecting financial questions, mediation may leave you feeling uncertain.
Collaborative Practice sits between these two extremes. It’s not as adversarial or court-heavy as litigation but offers more structured safeguards than mediation. You still have your own collaboratively trained attorney, and the presence of a neutral financial specialist can bolster your confidence about full disclosure. The no-court agreement helps keep everyone focused on transparency, making it a potentially ideal path forward if you’re concerned about your spouse’s honesty.
Check out Part 1 and Part 3 of this blog!
